The Least of These

  El Roi- The God who Sees Me Genesis 16 & 21:8-20 During a session of “praying through” on 2-19-21, I had a vision. I was looking at a glass window from the inside as rain fell. I could see numerous raindrops hit the window and slowly roll away. It was then that God said to me:   “These are the tears that you have shed tonight, and I am holding every one of them. I am the God who Sees you. I see you at your best. I see you at your worst. I see you in the in-between. You do not have to be perfect to be in my presence. I have forgiven you of what you ask. Now forgive yourself.” God is not some far away, impersonal entity. He is with us every day. He is with us in the morning, in the evening. When we are coming and going. While we are weeping & rejoicing. He is for us & always will be for us. God sees you in the every-day activities. He sees you when you feel alone. He is with you in the depths of your depression & anxiety. He is with you when you...

  To the moms out there who are struggling. Who are just getting by. Who are hanging on by their very last thread. I see you. God sees you. & we will get through this season. I expected our state to have different news today. I was looking forward to our children having normal lives again. Being able to return to school and outdoor activities. I was looking forward to mandates slowly lifting. But right now, that is just not the case. I can picture moms just wanting to scream at the tv right now and wonder what went wrong. You had to leave your job to teach your children at home. Your finances are wrecked and your bills are piling up. It seems like every day just gets harder and harder. I see you. You are a foster parent. The state shutdown has completely altered the life of your child/children. A child who has experienced trauma yet was doing so well with routine. Now, they (still) cannot have in-person visits with their family. They are triggered by past experiences every day ...

They say a picture is worth a thousand words . I say a picture tells a story that has a chapter or two torn out. I was going through old photos yesterday and came across our first "Family" photo session. This first picture was taken in 2016 when Jonathan was around 3 months old. Andy & I had been married for a little over two years.  We were brand new parents. Our world had completely changed. A tiny little blessing now consumed our lives. Some of the "thousand words" you may think of when you see this first picture could be: They look so happy. In love. A new family doting over their baby. Perfect. That baby is so cute! They are so lucky! Just to name a few....... ...................................................................... Now I will really tell you what was really going on in this photo: An identity crisis (in both of us). Lack of sleep. Mom guilt. Troubled marriage. Lost (spiritually, emotionally & mentally). Mom guilt. Not eating enough. Takin...

With love , I am about to share my heart with you. I am leaving many details out because it is more of my husband's story to tell than my own. I want to talk to you about my family. Most of you are aware that my husband was deployed for 8 months. He left in November (pre COVID). He came home at the end of June. The country he came home to is not the country he left. Our culture is now extremely sensitive to everything and now lives in complete fear, anger & anxiety. We are all suspicious of one another and blame the other for why things are.  My husband, though in the Air National Guard, is very often mistaken for a Law Enforcement Officer. His head is shaved. He walks with discipline. He carries himself respectfully & he does not play when it comes to his family.  This was never a problem before.  The past couple weeks, I am starting to notice the behaviors of others. How when it is just me, they are polite. When I am with my husband, they are short with response...

The first mention of Jehovah Nissi was during a battle between the Israelites & the Amalekites beginning in Exodus 17:8. As Joshua fought the Amalekites on flat ground, Moses took Aaron & Hur to the top of a hill. There, Moses fought a spiritual battle. He lifted his hands to the heavens & raised the staff of God above his head. “As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning.” – Exodus 17:11 Moses held his hands & his rod high up in the air using his faith as his weapon. He knew that God would defeat their enemy. As Moses hands & arms grew tired, Aaron & Hun held his hands up for him . One friend on each side so that the hands of Moses remained steady until sunset. At this point, Joshua overcame the Amalekite army. (Exodus 17:12-13) To celebrate this huge victory, Moses built an altar & called it “ The LORD is my Banner ”. In this name, there is a promise . A promise th...

Do you ever scroll social media or watch your preferred news outlet & think " It's a bad time to be ..." Every so many years, I often catch this thought. But the year 2020 is different. It is much different. Hate and evil have magnified into this huge pit of anger, despair, frustration & anxiety. Our problems are not carnal. It is not just the media influence or race or COVID 19. We are in a spiritual war against something that wants to steal, kill & destroy us. Right now, I would say that he isn't doing a bad job at reaching his goal.  I have caught myself thinking... "It's a bad time to be..." A cop. A healthcare professional. A teacher. A soldier. African American. Caucasian. A parent. A student. A private business owner. A church leader. A government official. So much tension in this world from racial injustices & defunding the very people who are supposed to meet us at our worst moments. So much tension over COVID-19, closures, weari...